Wednesday 29 April 2020

The Man in Black in a Battle of Wits -黒覆面の騎士と機知の戦い-


In the second extract from William Goldman’s book, “The Princess Bride,” the hero is trying to rescue a princess.  The hero is the man in black, and the Princess Buttercup has been kidnapped by the evil and boastful Vizzini, who has a knife at her throat.  The man in black cannot attack Vizzini, or the princess will be killed.  So he suggests that the situation is resolved by a battle of wits.  The smarter man will live, and the less intelligent man will die. 

Edited extract from “The Princess Bride”: 

"We are at an impasse then," said the man in black. 

"I fear so," said Vizzini. "I cannot compete with you physically, and you are no match for my brains." 

"You are that smart?" 

"There are no words to contain all my wisdom. I am so cunning, crafty and clever, so filled with deceit, as tricky as I am untrustworthy . . . well, I told you there were not words invented yet to explain how great my brain is, but let me put it this way: the world is several million years old and several billion people have at one time or another walked upon it, but I, Vizzini the Sicilian, am, speaking with pure candour and modesty, the smartest man yet to walk the Earth.” 

"In that case," said the man in black, "I challenge you to a battle of wits." 

Vizzini had to smile. "For the Princess?" 

"You read my mind." 

"It just seems that way, I told you. It's merely logic and wisdom. To the death?" 

"Correct again." 

"I accept," cried Vizzini. "Begin the battle!" 

"Pour the wine," said the man in black. 

Vizzini filled the two goblets with deep-red liquid. The man in black pulled from his dark clothing a small packet and handed it to the Sicilian. "Open it and inhale, but be careful not to touch." 

Vizzini took the packet and followed the instructions. "I smell nothing." 

The man in black took the packet again. "You cannot smell it but it is called iocane poison. It has no smell, no taste, and dissolves immediately in any kind of liquid. It also happens to be the deadliest poison known to man." 

Vizzini was beginning to get excited. 

"I don't suppose you'd hand me the goblets," said the man in black. 

Vizzini shook his head. "Take them yourself. My long knife does not leave her throat." 

The man in black reached down for the goblets. He took them and turned away. 

Vizzini laughed aloud in anticipation. 

The man in black busied himself a long moment. Then he turned again with a goblet in each hand. Very carefully, he put the goblet in his right hand in front of Vizzini and put the goblet in his left hand in front of himself. He dropped the empty iocane packet by the cheese. 

"Your guess," he said. "Where is the poison?" 

* 

Vizzini sounds a little like Donald Trump.  So will the evil Sicilian guess correctly?  Who will win the battle of wits, and how?  Find out next week!


Vocabulary:

boastful – showing excessive pride and satisfaction in one’s own achievements

one’s wits – one’s intelligence and ability to think

an impasse – a deadlock or situation which cannot be resolved because two parties are evenly matched

to be no match for – to be unable to compete with; to be weaker in ability than

cunning–having or showing ability to get what you want by lying, clever tricks, etc.

crafty - cunning

deceit – the action of misleading someone by hiding the truth or misrepresenting the truth

candour – the quality of being open and honest; frankness

to inhale something – to breathe something in

anticipation–excited expectation of something happening in the future

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