Stretching the Years －年伸ばし－

Have you ever heard a dog owner talking about the age of their dog, and using the term, “dog years?” 

Dogs obviously mature more quickly than humans, and have a shorter life expectancy.  So to give humans a rough idea of how mature their dog is, the concept of “dog years” can be useful.

According to this concept, after one year, a dog is 15 years old in dog years.  At the age of 2, they are 24 years old in dog years.  And each year after that, they age 5 dog years.  So a 6 year old dog would be in middle age, or about 44 years old in dog years. 

As a man in middle age, I have recently been thinking about the course of life, pensions and so on.  But it occurred to me that since I am married to a Japanese woman, who has a longer life expectancy than I do, I have to think in terms similar to dog years.  According to Wikipedia, the average life expectancy at birth for a man born in Glasgow (my home town) is 73.6 years.  Yet the average life expectancy for a woman born in Japan is 87.1 years. 

I reckon that I can calculate my age in “Japanese woman years” by dividing my age by 73.6, and then multiplying the result by 87.1. 

By that calculation, although I am 44 years old, I become about 52 years old in JW Years. 

No wonder my knees are painful, and I can’t remember names like I used to. 

Japanese women can do the calculation in reverse, in order to find their age in “Glaswegian man years.”  So a 50 year old woman becomes 42 GM Years old. 

I am a very popular man with older Japanese women.