Black Sheep －黒い羊－

Do you have any brothers or sisters?  If you do, were you the favourite child of your parents?  Or was one of your siblings more favoured? 

According to an article I read this week, most people reading this who do have siblings believe that a different child was their parents’ favourite.  In a survey on this topic, about four in five people said that their parents favoured one of their brothers or sisters.  Because most of the respondents came from families of fewer than five children, this cannot be true. 

So children seem to over-estimate the level of favouritism that their parents show to their other siblings.  Perhaps we all like to see ourselves as having been treated unfairly. 

But do parents really have favourite children?  One study of UK parents indicated that 74 per cent of mothers and 70 per cent of fathers do show favouritism towards one child.  However, only about 10 per cent of parents admit their favouritism when directly questioned. 

The article claimed that parents often favoured the youngest child, perhaps because they had become more confident at parenting by the time the last child was born.  Parents also preferred the children that they saw as being most like themselves. 

The least favourite child in the family, or the one who stands out, used to be called the “black sheep”.  Now that it is becoming rarer for parents to have multiple children, there are fewer favourites, and fewer black sheep.  There are more little emperors now!

 

The Little Sumo and the Gingerbread Dragon, part 3 －小さなお相撲さんとジンジャーブレッドの竜 パート3－

In parts 1 and 2, Daddy came out of a betting shop carrying a lot of money that he had won.  The Little Sumo and Mummy stayed in their browney-orange car.  But a knight on a horse thought that their car was a ginger dragon and charged forward to attack it.  When he realised his mistake, he fell off his horse.  Everyone gathered around the knight as he told them about the terrible ginger dragon, which was terrorising the town and stealing money from the inhabitants. 

* 

Just then a shadow passed overhead.  There was a huge rushing of wind, which almost blew the Little Sumo off his feet.  Daddy clutched desperately to the money in his hand to prevent it from being blown away.  There was a loud thump, which caused the ground to shake.  Everyone stared as a huge ginger dragon landed in the street, just next to Mummy and Daddy’s car. 

“Umm…” said the knight.  “Although being an accountant wasn’t such a bad job, really.” 

The dragon’s neck twisted and it stared down at the group with its terrible, reptilian eyes.  It opened its mouth, revealing two rows of very sharp teeth. 

* 

Part 3: 

“Kraaark!  I smell money,” said the dragon.  “Lovely, lovely money to add to my hoard!  Kraaark!” 

The Little Sumo thought that the dragon sounded a bit like a parrot, but also a bit like a human.  He wondered how something so big and heavy could fly.  His book about animals had told him that birds had hollow bones to make them lighter, and make it possible for them to fly.  He wondered if the dragon had a really light body too.  But he couldn’t see the dragon’s bones, of course.  He could only see the outside of its bright ginger body. 

“Kraaark!” continued the dragon, looking at Daddy, and the money he held in his hand.  “Give me your money, or I will eat you up!  Kraaark!” 

Daddy turned to look at the knight, who had claimed to be a dragon slayer.  “Weren’t you going to, um, do something,” said Daddy.  “Wasn’t there some work you had to do?” 

The knight waved his hands frantically.  “You mean some accounting work?  Yes.  Now that you mention it, I probably should be getting back to my office.  I have a lot of accounting work to do.” 

Mummy sniffed the air.  “Is there a bakery near here?  I could swear someone was cooking gingerbread.” 

“Kraaark!” said the dragon, swaying his neck impatiently from side to side.  “I’m getting hungry.  Give me the money quickly, or I’ll eat you!  Kraaark!” 

Daddy looked at the money in his hand and then back at the dragon.  “If you are hungry,” he said, “I could buy some bread from the bakery.  Do you, um, like bread?” 

While everyone was talking, the Little Sumo noticed that the dragon’s huge ginger tail was swishing around.  It came quite close to where he was standing.  “Maybe he won’t notice if I touch it and see if it is very light,, or whether it contains bones,” he thought. 

The Little Sumo reached out a hand and touched the dragon’s tail.  It was strangely soft and squidgy, like a cake. 

“You had better give him the money, Daddy,” said Mummy.  “I don’t want to be eaten.” 

“Kraaark!  Yes.  You shouldn’t keep a hungry dragon waiting.  Kraaark!” said the dragon. 

The Little Sumo squeezed the tail, trying to feel for the bones inside.  Strangely, a large piece of the tail broke off just where he was holding it. 

“Kraaark!  What are you doing?  Kraaark! Shouted the dragon. 

The Little Sumo was now holding a long, squidgy piece of tail.  He peered at it closely, then put one end of the tail in his mouth and started chewing.  His eyes lit up. 

“What is it?” said Mummy. 

“Gingerbread!” exclaimed the Little Sumo, happily. 

Daddy reached out a hand and touched the dragon’s wing.  A big chunk of the wing broke off, and he put it in his mouth.  “It’s gingerbread too!” he said. 

“K – um - Kraaark!  Stay back!  Kraaark!” said the dragon.  It started shuffling backwards, trying to make room for itself to run.  Perhaps, thought the Little Sumo, it needed to build up speed before it could fly away.  But unfortunately for the dragon, it didn’t get far.  Mummy broke off a piece of its other wing, and started munching the gingerbread, and the knight had regained his courage too, and broke off a piece of the dragon’s body.  Suddenly, many of the townsfolk, who had been hiding behind locked doors came out and started tearing chunks of gingerbread off the dragon. 

“Kraaark!  I need to speak to my lawyer.  Um, krark?” 

The gingerbread feast lasted about twenty minutes.  First, the townsfolk finished off eating the dragon’s tail, then the wings, then the legs, then the body, and finally the head.  Gingerbread has this effect on people. 

Under the gingerbread body, there was a flying machine, controlled by the town’s baker.  A wire connected a microphone in the body to a speaker in the dragon’s head. 

A policeman came by, eating something.  “You’re under arrest!” he said to the baker. 

“And you can stop speaking like a parrot!” said Mummy.  “All those Kraaarks are getting annoying.” 

“The Little Sumo looked at what the policeman was eating.  “I spy, with my little eye, something beginning with D.”

 

Vocabulary:

hollow – containing an empty space inside

frantically - desperately

“I could swear…” – I am sure…; It really seems to me that…

to swish – to move with a rushing sound of air being pushed aside

squidgy – (British English, casual) soft, spongy and moist]

 

The Little Sumo and the Gingerbread Dragon, part 2 －小さなお相撲さんとジンジャーブレッドの竜 パート2－

In part 1, the Little Sumo, Mummy and Daddy were on holiday, driving in their browney-orange car.  The Little Sumo thought he saw an orangey-brown dragon in the sky, but Mummy and Daddy didn’t see it, and didn’t believe him.  Mummy parked the car to let Daddy enter a betting shop.  While the Little Sumo and Mummy were waiting for him to return, they heard a strange noise coming from behind their car.

*

The Little Sumo looked round, out of the back windscreen.  “Mummy, look!” he said.

Trotting down the street was a huge white horse.  On its back was a knight in shining armour, carrying a bright and long lance.

He spotted their mud-spattered, browny-orange car and gave a great shout.  “Huzzah!  I’ve got you now and you won’t escape my steel!”

The knight flipped his visor down and lowered his lance, pointing the deadly end forward.  Then his horse came on at speed, charging towards the Little Sumo and Mummy in their car.

*

Part 2:

The Little Sumo saw the knight and the horse getting closer to the car, the knight’s weapon pointing towards the windscreen, right where he was sitting.  He heard Mummy turning on the engine of the car and getting ready to move it.  But she would be too late to escape.

Just then Daddy came running out of the betting shop towards the car, waving excitedly.  “I’ve won!  I’ve won!” he shouted.  He hadn’t noticed the charging horse now coming towards him.

“Whoah!” shouted the knight, lifting his lance to avoid hitting Daddy.  The horse suddenly slowed and came to a stop by jumping and raising its forelegs into the air, halting just in front of Daddy, who looked very surprised.

Unfortunately, the sudden movement of the horse caused the knight to fall backward and off the horse.  He landed with a huge metal clunk on the pavement.

Mummy opened the car doors, and she, the Little Sumo and Daddy all walked towards the fallen knight.

“Are you all right?” asked Daddy.

“What were you doing?  You could have killed us!” demanded Mummy.

“Why are you wearing metal clothes?” asked the Little Sumo.

The knight scrambled to his feet.  “Be careful, Sir!” he said.  “You walked right in front of the ginger dragon!”  He pointed behind Daddy, at the browney-orange car.

Mummy looked round.  “That’s not a ginger dragon,” she said.  “It’s our orange car.”

“With brown mud on it,” added the Little Sumo.

The knight lifted his face visor so that he could see more clearly.  “Oh, yes.  It’s a browney-orange car.  You are right.”

While the knight stood, looking at the car in some embarrassment, Daddy took the opportunity to pull a large wad of green paper bills out of his pocket, and wave them in the air.  “Hey Mummy, Little Sumo – look at all the money I won!”

“Never mind your bad gambling habit just now, Daddy” said Mummy.  “I want to know about this ginger dragon.”

The knight looked at Mummy.  “You must be visitors here, if you haven’t heard about the ginger dragon,” he said.  “In recent days he has been terrorising the inhabitants of this town.  He is very greedy for money.  When the dragon sees a rich looking victim, he threatens to eat them if they don’t hand over their money and valuables.  Like all dragons, he is building a hoard of treasure.  So the frightened townsfolk hired me, a professional dragonslayer, to find this ginger dragon and bring him to justice!  I thought your browney-orange car was the dragon for a moment there.  And that’s why I’m wearing these metal clothes, young man,” he said to the Little Sumo.  “This is armor, to protect my body from the bite of the dragon.”

“Have you beaten many dragons?” asked the Little Sumo.

“Ah…” said the knight, “This will be the first.  I used to be an accountant.  I’m kind of new to the dragonslaying business, really.  I wanted to spend less time in an office, and do more work outdoors.”

Just then a shadow passed overhead.  There was a huge rushing of wind, which almost blew the Little Sumo off his feet.  Daddy clutched desperately to the money in his hand to prevent it from being blown away.  There was a loud thump, which caused the ground to shake.  Everyone stared as a huge ginger dragon landed in the street, just next to Mummy and Daddy’s car.

“Umm…” said the knight.  “Although being an accountant wasn’t such a bad job, really.”

The dragon’s neck twisted and it stared down at the group with its terrible, reptilian eyes.  It opened its mouth, revealing two rows of very sharp teeth.

*

Oh dear!  Will the Little Sumo soon become dragon food?  Will Daddy get to enjoy the money he has just won?  Find out next time!

Vocabulary:

to halt – to bring or come to an abrupt stop

a wad – a bundle or roll of paper or bank notes

a bill – a note; paper money

a hoard – a stock or store of money or valuable objects, typically one which is secret or carefully guarded

The Little Sumo and the Gingerbread Dragon, part 1 －小さなお相撲さんとジンジャーブレッドの竜 パート1－

The Little Sumo was on holiday with Mummy and Daddy.  He sat in the back of the car, intently looking out of the window.  Mummy was at the wheel of their old and shabby orange family car, driving toward their hotel.  In fact their car had once been orange.  Now it was so old an spattered with mud that it had become browny-orange.  Daddy was in the front, in the passenger seat.  He too was intently looking out of the window. 

“I spy, with my little eye, something beginning with H,” said Daddy. 

The Little Sumo scanned the people on the pavement.  He spotted a policeman.  “Hat!” he shouted. 

“No,” said Daddy.  “Try again.” 

Mummy made a suggestion.  “Is it a human?” she asked. 

“Nope,” said Daddy.  “Try again.” 

The little sumo scanned the buildings at the side of the road.  “House!” he said. 

“That’s right,” said Daddy.  “Now it’s your turn.” 

So the Little Sumo looked ahead, then to the side, and then behind the car. 

“Well, hurry up!” said Daddy.  “Have a good look around and just pick something you can see.” 

The Little Sumo looked through the window and up into the sky.  “I spy, with my little eye, something beginning with D,” he said. 

“A dog?” suggested Daddy. 

“No,” said the Little Sumo.  “Try again!” 

Mummy made a guess.  “Uh… a doughnut?” she said.  “I didn’t see that policeman we passed eating one, but I’m quite sure that policemen always have doughnuts.” 

“No, Mummy, you’re wrong,” said the Little Sumo.  “Try again!” 

Daddy spoke next.  “A duck?  No, there aren’t any ducks.  A daffodil?  No, there aren’t any daffodils here either.  Okay, I give up.  What do you see that begins with the letter D?” 

“A dragon!” shouted the Little Sumo, happily. 

Mummy laughed out loud.  “I was just joking about the doughnut.  You’ve got to pick something you can actually see,” she said.  “You can’t just make something up, like seeing a dragon.” 

“But I did see a dragon,” said the Little Sumo, pointing to the sky.  “It had big wings and a long neck, and a tail, and it was kind of orangey-brown.” 

Daddy twisted in his seat to try to get a better look at the sky.  “Well, I can’t see anything,” he said.  Maybe it was a bird or a plane.” 

“It’s gone now,” said the Little Sumo.  “But it was there just before, flying in the sky!” 

“Oh!” said Daddy.  “I spy, with my little eye, something beginning with B - a betting shop!  I want to stop and make a bet on the important horse race today,” he said. 

“Oh, Daddy!  Do you have to go to a betting shop when we are on holiday?” said Mummy. 

“Well, it’s a very big, important race today,” he said.  “I just gamble once a year.  It’s a kind of tradition.  And I might win some money for us to spend on our holiday.”  He looked at his watch.  “The race will start soon.  I think I’ve got just enough time to place my bet.” 

So Mummy parked the car while Daddy went into the betting shop.  Mummy and the Little Sumo waited in the car for him to return. 

After a few minutes, the Little Sumo noticed that his window was trembling slightly, as if the ground under the car was being pushed by a heavy weight.  Then he heard a loud sound coming from behind them.  Clip-clop, clip-clop.  It was getting louder, coming nearer.  Clip-clop, clip-clop! 

The Little Sumo looked round, out of the back windscreen.  “Mummy, look!” he said. 

Trotting down the street was a huge white horse.  On its back was a knight in shining armour, carrying a bright and long lance. 

He spotted their mud-spattered, browny-orange car and gave a great shout.  “Huzzah!  I’ve got you now and you won’t escape my steel!” 

The knight flipped his visor down and lowered his lance, pointing the deadly end forward.  Then his horse came on at speed, charging towards the Little Sumo and Mummy in their car. 

* 

Oh, dear.  I hope that Mummy and the Little Sumo aren’t speared by this knight and his lance.  Will Daddy come out of the betting shop to the scene of a disaster?  And what happened to that dragon in the sky?  Find out in part 2 next time!

 

Vocabulary:

to do something intently – to do something with great focus and attention

to be shabby – to be old and in a bad condition

to be spattered with something – to be randomly covered with many splashes or little pieces of something.  For example, “The workman’s shirt was spattered with paint.”

to make something up – to invent or create something fictional

 

Voodoo People Like Us －私たちのようなブードゥー人間－

“Magic people: Voodoo people,

The voodoo who do what you don’t dare do, people.”

From the Prodigy song, “Voodoo People”

Do you remember the scene in the Indiana Jones movie, “The Temple of Doom” in which an evil child sticks a pin into a doll?  The doll represented Indiana Jones, and whenever the pin was stuck into the doll’s body, the real Indiana Jones started screaming in pain. 

This scene seems to be based on the idea of a Voodoo doll.  The movie is set in India and Voodoo originated in West Africa, so it was a little strange to use it in the movie.  But I can’t think of a better example of Voodoo dolls in popular culture. 

Not many people reading this blog will believe that sticking a pin into a doll representing your enemy can really cause that enemy to feel pain.  But it is not hard to believe that sticking the pin into the Voodoo doll can bring you pleasure! 

I recently read about a scientific study in which people were asked to remember a time when they were the victim of an injustice – for example, to remember a time when they were bullied at work.  Then half of the people studied were given the chance to stick a pin into a representation of the person who had wronged them, and half were not.  According to the researchers the people who stuck the pins in (actually, they stuck “virtual pins” into an image on a computer screen) experienced positive mental benefits.  Their feelings of injustice and victimhood were lessened by the symbolic act of revenge.  Even though their enemy in the real world was not harmed, they still got some psychological benefit from taking action to harm a representation of their enemy. 

So now you know what to do the next time your boss asks you to do overtime.

 

Making Mummified Chicken, Korean Style －韓国風鶏のミイラを作ること－

“Oh, God,” I thought, “Let the dessert be small!” 

I had already eaten crispy vegetables in batter, fruit wrapped in kimchee, toppogi (pounded rice), chijimi (a bit like a pancake), dak hanmari (a whole chicken and vegetable hot pot), and udon noodles.  I was full before the end of the chicken hot pot.  Like a soldier going into battle, I got through the hot pot and the udon, feeling my belly bulge against my waistband. 

“Maybe it will be one scoop of ice cream, or a single wafer of chocolate?” I hoped. 

Then the waiter announced annin dofu in lemon (a sort of sweet curd made from apricot kernel).  And I prepared for one last battle. 

I was in a lovely Korean restaurant in Ebisu called Suragan.  It was a birthday treat and so I ordered the 4,500 Yen lunch course.  It was very good value, and the chijimi was particularly nice.  I had only ever eaten it in cheap izakayas before, and I was surprised at how fluffy and light it was. 

But I really wanted to try the dak hanmari hot pot.  It was very interesting.  The waiter had us test the soup to see if it was acceptable, before we started, as customers test a bottle of wine before the waiter pours a full glass.  The soup was indeed very rich and tasty. 

The trouble is, especially for a blind person, it is rather difficult to eat a whole chicken in soup with chopsticks.  I had to pick a bit out with the chopsticks, try to find a bony bit, and then hold the bone with my fingers while I tore off the meat.  And the restaurant provided a little pot to put the bones into.  My wife commented that it put her in mind of the process of creating a mummy.  I know what she meant.  In ancient Egypt the embalmers used lots of little pots to put in various body parts that could not be preserved. 

For a Scotsman like me, one of the benefits of living in Tokyo is the quality of Asian restaurants.  Of course the Japanese food is nice.  But there are also lots of Koreans and Chinese living here.  And there are good Vietnamese and Thai restaurants too.  Scotland has good Indian and Cantonese restaurants, but not so many nice restaurants from other Asian countries. 

I’ll be sure to enjoy Korean food again.  But maybe a smaller course next time.

 

Half a Glass of Chilled Beer －グラス半分の冷えたビール－

French philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre once wrote a play in which three characters are punished in the afterlife by being forced to spend an eternity locked together in a room.  This is sometimes summarised in the phrase, “Hell is being locked in a room with your friends”, or just, “Hell is other people.” 

Sartre’s vision of Hell came to mind this week when more than sixty people were trapped for several days and nights in a pub in the north of England.  People gathered at the pub to see an Oasis tribute band when there was a sudden flurry of snow.  The pub became cut off, and the concert-goers as well as the band were snowed in.  The strangers had to sleep on floors and sofas, and spend days trapped in a small space with strangers, listening to covers of Oasis songs.  Sartre probably would have committed suicide by the second day. 

But being stuck in a pub has its good points too.  English poet William Blake once said, “A good local pub has much in common with a church, except that a pub is warmer, and there is more conversation.” 

Perhaps a comparison of Sartre and Blake says something about the differing temperaments of the English and the French? 

The snowed in patrons seem to have sided with Blake, and taken the view that their glasses were half-full, not half-empty.  Speaking to the media about the incident, the pub owner said, "All of our guests have just been wonderful, so we've been incredibly lucky. They've been very supportive, understanding and patient.”  She said customers had helped out with washing up, clearing tables and collecting glasses. 

I must say that I’m not a big fan of Oasis.  After hearing a dodgy cover version of Wonderwall for the fiftieth time in four days, I probably would have agreed with Sartre.

 

Vocabulary:

a tribute band – a band that plays only cover versions of one particular band

a flurry of snow – a sudden heavy snowfall

to be snowed in – to be trapped and unable to leave because of heavy snow

a patron – a customer; someone who supports a business etc. with their money

dodgy – of low quality; unreliable