Singapore counts the bear necessities of making babies －シンガポールは（熊に）無くてはならない子作りを計算する－

“Look for the bare necessities, the simple bare necessities.  Forget about your worries and your strife.”

Baloo the bear, from Disney’s “The Jungle Book”

What is the best way to live your life: living entirely in the moment, trusting your animal instincts – or planning every move as carefully as a lawyer or accountant?  If you don’t own your own home and aren’t financially secure, should you quit worrying and just start a family, or hold off and save some more?

The Singaporean government is very clear.  With a low birth-rate and an aging population, they would very much like young Singaporeans to stop worrying about the future and just hurry up and make babies.

The Minister of State, Josephine Teo, said this week, “In France, in the UK, in Nordic countries, man meets woman... They can make a baby already.  They love each other... They also don’t have to worry about marriage.  That comes later.”

I’m not quite sure if this is complimentary towards the French, British and Scandinavians or not.  I am sure she is trying to hold these societies up as good examples for Singapore to follow, but she makes them seem completely driven by instinct.  I picture bear-like, hairy men prowling the streets.  Although Britain may be more relaxed about relationships, this image might be a little unfair.

The minister contrasted this supposedly easy attitude towards making babies in the West to that in Singapore.  “In the case of Singapore, man meets woman, falls in love, proposes, and then they plan the wedding and a house.”

There’s not much bear-like about that image of Singaporeans.  I instead picture a nation of accountants, carefully calculating every penny of profit and loss before making a decision.  I don’t know Singapore very well, but I wonder if this image is also unfair?

In the same week, Janet Jackson announced that she had become pregnant at the age of 50.  Which just goes to show that even with money and a big house, some people still take their time.

 

Vocabulary:

the bare necessities – the absolute minimum required

to live in the moment – to concentrate on the present, not the past or future

instinct – of animals, natural desires or behaviour

an accountant – a person whose job is to keep financial records

to hold off – to delay

complimentary – expressing praise or approval

to prowl - to move like an animal, especially one searching for prey

 

 

Follow that bus! - Getting over the travel blues －あのバスを追え！ トラベルブルースの克服－

Last week I wrote a little about my frustrated desire to travel, and of a feeling of being stuck at home in suburban Sakuradai, Tokyo.  It got me thinking about what makes for a good trip.  Is it the golden temples?  Is it the mad rush to see all the sights listed in your guidebook in the few days you have?

I would argue from my own experience that it is not.  It won’t be the golden temples you remember when you think of your trip abroad.  It will be getting lost, and the helpful person in the street who goes several blocks out of their way to set you in the right direction.  Or it will be realising that you are sitting on the wrong train with only minutes to spare, and rushing off in a panic before the doors close.  Or it will be wandering into a restaurant off the beaten track where no one speaks your language and you have to point to what someone else is eating and hope for the best.

Thinking of the ten weeks or so I spent some years ago in south-east Asia, it is moments like that which really stick in my mind.

Perhaps the clearest memory is of taking a night-bus from Chiang Mai in the north of Thailand to Bangkok.  Despite leaving in the evening and arriving in the morning, the driver was determined that if he had to stay awake then nobody else should be allowed to sleep.  So he put on some dreadful Thai tv variety show and turned the volume up painfully loud.  And then left it on all night.  So I arrived in Bangkok the next morning completely exhausted.

For some reason I was carrying a lot of bags.  One of them was probably full of a week’s worth of dirty laundry.  I wanted to get off near my hotel, so I left the bus before the final stop.  Unfortunately, because I was so tired and had several bags, I accidentally left one bag on the bus.  It contained my passport.  I didn’t notice I had left it until I was off the bus and it had closed its doors and was pulling away.  I then realised with panic that it would be very hard to find the bus and get the bag back if I didn’t do something fast.

So I quickly found a motorbike taxi and climbed on the back.  “Follow that bus!” I told the driver, and he did, just like in a movie.

I put on the helmet he gave me, but soon noticed that the strap was broken.  It kept slipping down from my head, and I had to push it back up with one of my hands.  But I was carrying a bag in my other hand so I couldn’t hold onto the bike.  For a few seconds every time the helmet started to slip, I was hanging on to the bike with only my legs.

The motorbike was going fast to keep up with this bus, and the road had bumps and pot-holes.  Going over these without properly holding on, and wearing a helmet that could fall off at any time, I realised that this was probably the most stupid thing I had ever done in my life.  I was having visions of my parents’ surprise at their son’s death in an idiotic motorbike chase for a lost bag.  “He seemed smarter than that,” they were saying.

At last the bus arrived at the next stop.  The motorbike pulled in behind it, and I retrieved my bag.  I tipped the driver of the motorbike for not killing me, and went to find a proper car to take me to my hotel.

What have I been saying?  Now I remember all the difficulties of travel - all the times I have gotten lost, had to pay a bribe to get a document I had already paid for, been tricked into exchanging money at a terrible rate, been followed by a sinister man who seemed to hate foreigners, gotten on the wrong train, been stuck in a heavy downpour, been stuck in the snow in shoes with holes, had my wallet stolen, found cockroaches in my hotel room, found a poisonous scorpion sitting in my bed (no, really), seen a large sewer rat sniffing through the ingredients of a restaurant at which I was eating, had to argue with taxi drivers not to take me to a gem shop, got sunburned, got seasick, got food poisoning, been an a minor traffic accident (twice) – I’ve gotten well rid of my travel longings.  Stay at home.  It’s much safer in Sakuradai, and there’s a nice ramen restaurant around the corner. 

Vocabulary:

suburban – of the suburbs, or the outer, residential areas of a city

off the beaten track – away from areas usually travelled to; hard to get to

dreadful – terrible; awful

exhausted – extremely tired

a pot-hole – an unrepaired hole in a road

to retrieve – to get back

a bribe – a corrupt payment; money given to get a favour performed

sinister – evil-looking

a longing – a strong desire