Thursday, 8 February 2018

I have had it with these emotional snakes on an emotional plane! -この感情的な飛行機にいる感情的なヘビは、もうたくさんだ!-



Quiz-show host: “This is your final question.  Get this right and you will win 1 million dollars.  Are you ready?  Okay.  Name five things you can commonly see on an American airplane.”
Sweating contestant: “Umm... Cabin crew, passengers, luggage, a coffee trolley...  Umm... ummm... Snakes?”
The quiz-show host pauses dramatically.  “Cabin crew – yes.  Passengers – Yes.  Luggage – Yes.  A coffee trolley – Yes.  Snakes? - ...Yes!  Congratulations!  You win a million dollars!”
Okay.  I made up the exchange above.  And I might be exaggerating a little by saying that snakes are common on planes.  But the quiz is based upon a real article I read on the BBC today.
Usually, if a passenger wishes to take an animal onto a plane, they have to pay a lot of money to have the animal stowed in a separate area, along with the checked-in baggage.  But blind passengers are allowed to sit with their guide dogs in the passenger compartment.  And people who suffer extreme anxiety from flying are allowed to take an “emotional support animal” (ie. a pet) with them into the passenger compartment, to sit beside them during the flight.  These animals are often dogs or cats but have included birds, rats, and even snakes.
I’m not joking!  The news article said that United Airlines had just adopted a stricter policy.  They have banned hedgehogs, insects and reptiles from the passenger compartment.  They have had to do this because of increasing problems with animals biting cabin-crew, peeing on the floor etc.  The airline received over 70,000 requests last year alone to accommodate emotional support animals.
I am glad to say that British airlines generally don’t allow emotional support animals, although they do allow blind passengers to sit with their guide dogs.  This seems to be a peculiarly American phenomenon.
Are Americans really so emotionally fragile that they cannot go anywhere without Harry the Hedgehog in their pocket?  If someone is so terrified of flying, is stroking their pet snake really a more medically effective way of controlling their anxiety than taking a pill, or taking a ship/train?
Maybe the real reason for the surprisingly large number of Americans taking emotional support animals into the passenger compartment is financial.  You have to pay a lot of money to put an animal in the hold of an aircraft.  But to avoid penalising genuinely sick or disabled people, guide dogs and other support animals can be brought onto many airlines for free or a reduced price. 
I suffer from extreme flight anxiety too.  That’s why I’m campaigning for airlines to provide free “emotional support parachutes” to all passengers who have this terrible condition.

Vocabulary:
to make something up – to invent something; to create fiction
an exchange – a conversation; a series of comments between two people
to exaggerate – to make something seem bigger, worse etc. than it really is
to stow something – to pack or place something carefully
a guide dog – a specially trained dog, used by blind people to help them get around
anxiety – a feeling of strong uncertainty or insecurity
the passenger compartment – the part of an aircraft where the passengers sit
to adopt – to start to use
fragile – easily broken or damaged
to penalise someone – to punish someone; to make someone pay a penalty

 

No comments: