Dear 21st century,
Happy birthday! You are now 21. How does it feel?
I still remember the night that you were born. I was 19 years old, and I was still at university. Many people were talking about your coming birth, and were worried that the change would bring about a Millennium bug. People thought that aeroplanes would fall from the sky, and that nuclear power stations would explode the minute you were born. But luckily this didn’t happen. We partied like it was 1999, and then went to bed feeling optimistic.
We were not so optimistic when you were 1 year old. Terrorists flew planes into some tall buildings in New York, killing thousands of people. I remember lying in bed, half-asleep, and hearing my university flatmates talking in loud and shocked tones around the tv. For a while we wondered if the world would ever feel safe again.
But as you got older, you calm down. In your childhood years, new technologies seemed to offer great new opportunities. Even from Japan, I could see the streets of my old homes in Glasgow and Edinburgh on Google Street Map, and find out how they were changing. Facebook was a fun way to keep in touch with old friends, and we innocently Liked each others’ photos and comments. What could be wrong with these convenient advances?
We all make mistakes when we are young. And I hate to remind you, but you did make a big mistake when you were 8 years old. You let those nasty Lehman Brothers make a mess for everyone. You wouldn’t order a sub-prime hamburger, would you? You wouldn’t sail on a sub-prime boat, would you? So why did you ever think that sub-prime mortgages would be a good idea?
I was a rebellious teenager too, you know. I didn’t listen to my parents. I listened to heavy metal music instead. So I suppose it was only natural that you went through your own, rebellious teenage years. There was Brexit in the UK, Trump in the US, Bolsonaro in Brazil… At least Japan was as politically boring as usual. It’s really not so bad to live in politically boring times.
I hope you’re starting to get over the illness which hit you badly when you were 20.Thank you for not passing it on to me last year. I’ve been to Wuhan, you know. I lived in China a while back, and visited the city one winter. A friendly woman on the same night train to Wuhan shared a meal of spiced meat with me. It tasted like duck. I’m pretty sure it wasn’t bat meat.
So, 21st Century, congratulations again. I hope to watch you grow for a long time into the future. Try to stay healthy and happy. And don’t look for too much excitement. I hear that the 20th century had a very exciting time in its 30s and 40s. Avoid nuclear war, asteroid impacts, and runaway climate change, and you should have your own child when you are about to turn 100. Oh, and could you find a cure for cancer before then, please?
Vocabulary:
the Millennium bug – the flaw in computer systems, which were programmed only to recognise years up to 1999, and which could crash when the date became 2000
flatmates – people who share a flat, or an apartment
rebellious – tending to fight against authority (one’s parents, the government, the police, etc.)
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