Thursday, 30 November 2017

Naughty, naughty -なんて悪い子なんでしょう-


“Now listen carefully,” said God. “I’m going to give you a whole garden full of fruits nuts and berries to eat.  Take as much as you like.  Try the oranges – they’re delicious.  But I’ve got just one small request: Don’t eat any of the apples from this tree.  It’s my special tree, and I’m going to make some lovely apple cider for myself as a treat for all the work I’ve been doing recently.  That’s fair, isn’t it?.”
God went away, and the humans felt very naughty.
“Welcome to Thailand.  Feel free to enjoy the sunshine and beaches, drink beer, eat green curry, and explore our ancient temples.  Oh, we have just one small request.  Don’t pull your trousers down inside the temples to take photos of your bum.  They are our special temples, and we like to keep the atmosphere respectful so that we can go to Heaven after we die.  That’s fair, isn’t it?”
The Thai authorities went away, and the tourists felt very naughty.
In the Bible story, the first humans ignored God’s reasonable request, and ate the apples.  They were then punished and thrown out of Paradise.  And in Thailand this week, two American tourists ignored the authorities’ reasonable request, and took pictures of their exposed bums inside a temple.  They are to be fined and thrown out of Thailand.
Will humans never learn?  We seem to be irrepressibly naughty by nature.  As soon as someone sets a rule, we want to break it.  As soon as we are told not to do something, we want to do it.
Maybe governments should start using reverse-psychology to improve society.  To tackle obesity, they could set up gardens full of healthy fruit and vegetables and then tell people not to eat them.  Very soon, black market carrot dealers and spinach pushers will be selling the food to naughty teenagers.
Don’t recommend this blog to your friends.  It’s a secret.

Vocabulary:
One’s bum – the part of the body that one sits on
the authorities – the people in charge; the people who make the rules
exposed – of something usually supposed to be hidden, to be visible or in the open
irrepressibly – in a way that cannot be contained, held back, stopped etc.
reverse-psychology – the idea of getting someone to do something by telling them to do the opposite
obesity – the state of being very fat or overweight
black market – illegal to sell, but available unofficially
a pusher – slang for a drug dealer

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