I told you we shouldn’t have named our baby Adolf! －だから、アドルフって名前にすべきじゃないって言ったのに－

I read an article this morning which said that 20 per cent of British parents end up regretting the name they choose for their baby.  I know the feeling.  My wife gave birth to our first child last week, and we thought long and hard before naming him Ewan.  I wanted something which was Scottish, but we also needed something that worked in Japanese, and that hopefully he wouldn’t hate later in life.

It’s easy to see how you might come to regret the name you choose, even if you don’t pick something as obviously ill-advised as Adolf or Akuma (the name, meaning “wicked Devil” that an unfortunate Japanese child was given).

Just think of the poor parents who searched long and hard for an unusual but stylish name – something that would stand out from the crowd.  Eventually they find the name “Elsa” and are sure that the name has given their daughter the ring of dignity and uniqueness she deserves.  Then the next month the Disney movie Frozen comes out starring a princess named Elsa.  Now whenever they introduce their baby, people say, “Oh, like the princess!” or, “She does look a bit Scandinavian, doesn’t she?” or, “Careful with that ice, Elsa, ha ha!”

And that’s not as bad as the poor couple who chose to be even more unique and name their daughter after an ancient Egyptian goddess of health, marriage and wisdom.  When they chose the name Isis, I’m sure they thought it sounded beautiful and was full of hope and positivity, as well as being very unique.  Then shortly afterwards the terrorist group ISIS (the Islamic State in Syria group) became known the world over for beheading people and playing football with the heads.  There’s not much positivity there.  Now when they introduce their baby, they have to start with the explanation, “We don’t actually support terrorism, you understand.”

Well hopefully no terrorist group calls itself EWAN, Disney don’t do a Scottish themed blockbuster starring Prince Ewan, and that he doesn’t grow up to hate his name and change it to Taro.  At least we didn’t call him Adolf.

Vocabulary:

ill-advised – not sensible or wise; misguided

wicked – bad; evil

to stand out – to be noticeable or distinct

(to have) the ring of (dignity) – to sound or appear dignified

Scandinavian –[the film Frozen was set in a fictional Scandanavian kingdom]

to behead (someone) – to cut (someone’s) head off